The Silent Killer

Sadness is like a silent killer. You'll know it's there and even though it won't cause you any physical pain, you'll be dying on the inside and then one day it will take over you completely till there's nothing left anymore to be happy about.

I have been there and in fact, at some point of time in their lives, everyone has or will have to. I mean I look at people around me and I see them crying over stupid things and it suddenly makes me feel as if I'm the strongest person considering the fact that I never cry, no matter what. But I have realized that every person has a different way of being sad. Of saying goodbye. Of letting go.

These days, I've been reading this book On Death and Dying by Elizabeth Ross (Don't think that I'm too cynical) which suggests that a every person undergoes a five staged cycle of grief. The first stage is denial, where a person completely rejects their tragedy. Next is Anger in which all the frustration and sadness is transformed into anger. This is followed by bargaining, where a person helplessly tries to regain control and try to reverse the damage. Then comes depression. That's when the person starts to grieve internally and finally, there is acceptance, when the person tries to accept the truth and move on. 

I have been through tough times in my life and I have been sad as well but turns out every one has their own way of grieving. There is no fixed pattern for sorrow. There are people who cry and let it out. There are others who take out all their sorrow in form of anger. Then there also people who turn to drinking and then there is me. I don't cry in front of people. I don't even look as if I'm sad even though I feel like falling apart every moment. I try to console people and act strong where as only I know that I cry alone behind locked doors. It's my way of being sad but at the end I know that there always hope everyone.

 I know that there are battles to fight and people to loose but at the end of the day, you have to know that life goes on and so do you. You may fall, but then you'll learn to stand up again. You'll get hurt, and then you'll learn to heal. You'll loose people you love, but that's the only way you'll learn to let go.